Alpha Man (on the phone):On my way home, what do you want for dinner?
Me: Um, I'm good.
Alpha Man: You're good? What does that mean, you always want dinner.
Me: No, really, I'm good, I don't need anything.
Alpha Man: 'Xplain, Lucy.
Me: We have a bad connection, gotta go.
Alpha Man: You need more phlegm in your fake static. Tell me the truth. You just ate a huge bowl of Captain Crunch again and already have a stomach ache, right?
Me: Me? No, of course not. You hid the Captain Crunch.
Alpha Man: Which has never stopped you. I'm at the store. You need the usual?
Alpha Man: Pepto-Bisol coming up...